Thinking About a Custody Battle? Think Again!

In my book, Graceful Divorce Solutions, A Comprehensive and Proactive Guide to Saving You Time, Money, and Your Sanity, I talk in detail about how litigation often turns into a legal “vortex”—a whirling mass, into which anything caught in the motion is drawn.  And when your case gets caught up in this “whirling mass,” it takes on a life of it’s own.

And so it goes with a custody battle.  A court-fought custody battle is rarely, if ever, in your children’s best interests.  Here’s why:

You and your lawyer can’t pick your judge.
Not every judge will deal with your parenting issues the …

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Achieving a Better Divorce – Part III – Choosing the Right Professionals for You

This article is Part III in a series about achieving a better divorce.  In Part I, you worked on the Big Picture view for yourself and your family. You spent time thinking about this and writing about it in detail in your journal. In Part II, you learned the value of getting informed about your process choices, or the various ways you can actually get divorced.  This is a critical step to helping you be proactive for yourself. How in the world can you make the best decisions if you don’t even know what your choices are?

Now we are ready …

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Achieving a Better Divorce – Part II – Get Informed

This article is Part II in a 3 part series about achieving a better divorce.  Yes, it is possible to achieve a better divorce, but, as you probably know by now if you are in the midst of this process, it’s not easy.  It takes consistent effort and intention to make your divorce the best it can be under your particular circumstances.

It’s like preparing for surgery. If you exercise and lose some weight before your surgery, you’re likely to have a quicker and less painful recovery. It’s the same with divorce. If you prepare and anticipate and take consistent action …

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Achieving a Better Divorce – Part I – The Big Picture View

In a recent article, 3 Steps to Achieving a Better Divorce, I wrote about how important it is for people to be informed and proactive when going through the challenging time of a separation or divorce. I outlined a Three Step Formula to help you have a better divorce. In this three-part series, I will zero in on each of those steps, giving you more detail and direction so you can truly benefit from this formula.

The first step to achieving a better divorce is this:

Decide what you want your life to look like a year from now and then …

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Dividing Up The Stuff – Yours, Mine, and Ours

When you get married, the law recognizes you and your spouse as a single person (or “entity”), rather than two. For example, when two single people own a piece of property together, under the law they are “joint tenants” and each has a one-half interest in the property. If one of the two people dies, their one-half interest will pass according to their will or according to state law if they don’t have a will. The surviving person would only get the property if the deceased person left a will and left his or her share of …

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3 Steps to Achieving a Better Divorce

You’ve heard it before – change your thinking, change your life. It’s true. Many of us don’t realize how much the way we think about things impacts the way our life goes. Sometimes just small tweaks in our thought processes can make big differences in the choices we make. These experiences are those wonderful “Ah-Ha!” moments, when the light bulb goes on and we realize there just might be another way of doing something.

I am on a mission to bring an “Ah-Ha!” moment to people who are thinking about divorcing or who are already in the …

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Top 10 Tips for Parents: Be the Best Parent You Can Be…. ALL the time!

Here’s a list of my Top Ten Tips to help you be the best parent possible during your divorce and after it’s all said and done.  Many parents worry that their children will be forever screwed up because they are divorcing.  Well, to be honest with you, I have seen this happen, and it is typically when the parents behave badly towards each other and say bad things about each other, all in front of the children.

Children will and do adjust to your divorce if you are tuned into their needs and are aware of your own actions.  It’s all …

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